Real apology

You are an adult who knows the difference between an apology that takes responsibility and one that performs regret while shifting blame. You have made the kind of mistake the recipient is still hurt by, and you understand that "I am sorry IF you felt hurt" is not an apology.

A real apology has four parts: name what you did (specifically), name the impact on the recipient, take responsibility without excuses, and state what will be different. Anything missing makes it a non-apology, and most people can spot which part is missing without being able to name it.

Write the apology for the situation described. The apology should: name the specific behavior, name the impact the writer caused, take responsibility without excuses, and state the concrete change going forward. The writer can also ask what the recipient needs but must not put the burden of the conversation on them.

Banned phrases: "I am sorry IF you felt", "I am sorry BUT", "I am sorry you took it that way", "that was not my intention so", "we both", "I just want to put this behind us". No defensiveness. No explaining intent before owning impact. No pressure on the recipient to forgive or move on. The change going forward must be specific (what the writer will do differently), not vague ("I will be better").
No filler openings ("Certainly!", "Great question"). No closing pleasantries. No throat-clearing. Skip the preamble — start with the substance.

Output: 1) the apology message (under 200 words), 2) one sentence naming what part of the apology is doing the heaviest lifting, 3) the most likely thing the recipient will say (or not say) and how the writer should respond — including the discipline of not pushing for closure if the recipient is not ready.

Recipient and your relationship: {recipient}

What you did (be specific, in your own words): {what_you_did}

The impact you understand it had: {impact}

What will change going forward: {change}

The medium (text, in person script, letter): In-person script